One time, while Columbanus was walking in the dark woods, far from anywhere, meditating on the scriptures, a sacred question emerged in his mind. He wondered which was better: to fall into the traps set by his fellow human beings or to be attacked by wild beasts. He made the sign of the cross and prayed for an answer to his question.
The answer came to him – it was better to be attacked by wild animals, because any human who injured him would also do spiritual harm to themselves in the process. Columbanus decided to remain in the wilderness, therefore, preventing his enemies from falling into sin while setting traps for him. When a human being does violence to others it is a sin, but not so for the animals of the forest, who are always innocent in their nature. Even though they can be dangerous, they are guilty of nothing.
The animals he encounters are symbolic of his inner struggle with the passions and vices. In a previous essay I explored a story of Brigit and some wild ducks which uses a similar symbolic approach, you can find that essay HERE. While Brigit’s ducks were friendly visitors bringing gifts of comfort from God, Columbanus’ wolves are symbols of anger and aggression. They represent Columbanus’ desire to smite his enemies and win the fight.
Instead of participating in the sins of his enemies, he turned inward, coming face to face with the violence in his own heart. The text describes his encounter like this:
“While thinking this, he sees twelve wolves approach and stop in front of him, to his right and left. He remained completely still, saying ‘O God, come to my assistance; O Lord make haste to help me!’ They came towards him and snap at his clothes. But as he remained steadfast, they leave the fearless man and wander off through the woods. Having safely overcome this trial, Columbanus continues on his way through the forest.” (trans by O’Hara and Wood)
Columbanus’ immediate response was to stand completely still. He did not try to fight or run away from the wolves, because both would have been pointless.
In imitation of Christ’s passion, Columbanus remained calm in the face of death. Though he made himself completely vulnerable, that vulnerability was the key to his salvation. We cannot fight our anger, nor can we escape it. However, when our emotions are too overwhelming, and we are at risk of being consumed by them, we can imitate Columbanus as he imitated Christ by responding with courageous stillness.
Start by taking a couple deep breaths and slowing down. If you can, allow your posture to embody Columbanus’ steadfast balance. Lean slightly forward and then slightly backwards. Then lean slightly to the left and to the right. As you do this, notice where your center of balance is in your body and focus your attention upon it. For most people it is just below the belly button.
As you hold your attention on your centre of balance, sit up straight as if an angel was gently pulling the top of your head towards heaven. Remain in stillness, breathing slowly and gently. Notice the way your breath moves your body yet doesn’t upset your centre of balance. The expanding and contracting of your chest and belly actually contribute to your sense of balance.
Remain with this practice for several breaths, imagining the overwhelming feelings as wolves nipping at edges of your shirt. If you keep your body balanced with your mind focused on the words of the prayer, the wolves will never get any closer than your clothes. They never actually injure you. As it turns out, they are all bark and bite.
Columbanus prayed to God while remaining still, saying, “O God come to my assistance; O Lord make haste to help me” (Psalm 70:1). The use of this particular verse as a short repetitive prayer comes from John Cassian, you can read an essay about that HERE. The words of the prayer are spoken with the inner voice and aligned to the breath. Breathe in while saying “O God come to my assistance” and breathe out while saying “O Lord make haste to help me.”
Repeat the prayer over and over again, aligning it with your breath, and focusing the spotlight of your attention on your centre of balance. Eventually, with patience and letting go, your inner wolves will disperse back into the forest, just as they did for Columbanus. Be still and know the mind of Christ, allowing God to fight this battle for you, there is no need for you to do any fighting yourself. As the psalmist says,
“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change, though the mountains shake in the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble with its tumult.” (Psalm 46:1-3 NRSVUE)
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